Have you ever been in a conversation and felt like you have suddenly become completely hooked?I don't mean in a good way, rather in a way that you and another person are locked in some kind of emotional conflict that is difficult to pinpoint and harder even to break.Sometimes it is because … [Read more...] about When We Get Hooked
Two Ridiculously Simple Ways To Communicate Clearly
Get A New Story
You might not realize it, but you spend a lot of time broadcasting your story to the people in your life.Every time you share that you are "not good at" something like public speaking, taking risks or being courageous, you reinforce a narrative about yourself and how you want people to receive … [Read more...] about Get A New Story
“Expectation Is The Root Of All Heartache” – Shakespeare
What do you do when you have to speak in front of a large group of people or when you are expected to present information at a high-stakes meeting?There are three basic steps that everyone has to do in order to prepare themselves to be at their best when presenting in front of a group:Know what … [Read more...] about “Expectation Is The Root Of All Heartache” – Shakespeare
Give ‘Em Space (To Earn Trust)
Have you ever been in a situation where you are trying to communicate something important to another person, only to find that the more you talk the less they understand?If your answer is "no" then I'm going to assume that you have never tried to teach a teenager how to drive a car.No matter how … [Read more...] about Give ‘Em Space (To Earn Trust)
Authenticity Takes Hard Work
While there is so much talk in business and culture about authenticity (like here, here and here), there is very little talk about what it takes to get it.It's a little like the advice you'd get as a kid before going to a big interview or asking someone out on a date: "Just be yourself."Yes! So … [Read more...] about Authenticity Takes Hard Work
Your Leaky Face
Many of you might be unaware that your face is telling a story.Our faces have many muscles and nerves (I'm going to say a gazillion because I am very scientific about these things), and they all work to convey subtle emotions and communicate feelings. Other people are reacting to these emotions … [Read more...] about Your Leaky Face
Trust Yourself (In Order To Change)
What does it take to change successfully?Anyone can change the outer form of an organization. We can change the buildings, the organizational structures and our titles, but how do we make that change meaningful?How do we effectively guide an organization, a team, a family and ourselves through … [Read more...] about Trust Yourself (In Order To Change)
Risking Embarrassment
I always hated to feel embarrassed.There is something existentially threatening about everyone seeing me with my (proverbial) pants down.And over the course of my life I have made choices that helped to avoid that level of embarrassment and always to my detriment. I didn't raise my hand to … [Read more...] about Risking Embarrassment
Take Criticism Like an Artist
A few years ago I gave a presentation to the freshmen class of young artists at the Maine College of Art. The purpose of the workshop was to teach them how to talk about their work in a clear, concise and meaningful way so that anyone (not just other artists) could appreciate their vision. While it … [Read more...] about Take Criticism Like an Artist
Captain Kirk vs Mr. Spock
In recognition of Leonard Nimoy's recent passing, I decided to write on an underlying tension I see in most companies that require technical experience, that is the tension between our Spocks and our Kirks.The Captain Kirk world is made up of swashbuckling heroes of capitalism who defy the odds … [Read more...] about Captain Kirk vs Mr. Spock