The limitations of thinking. One of the challenges in communication is in cutting through our assumptions.Every relationship that goes beyond a simple transaction is fraught with potential challenges, confusion, and hurt feelings.Our thoughts are a big reason why this is so true. When … [Read more...] about Surface Your Assumptions
Our techniques to avoid failure.
Anything but that. Have you ever noticed a temptation to signal helplessness?I once was in a particularly difficult spin class where the instructor kept shouting to us to increase the resistance on our bikes.About halfway through the class, I was feeling like I had made a terrible mistake. … [Read more...] about Our techniques to avoid failure.
Pay attention
Just this. Here is one of my favorite W.S. Merwin poems, in which he encourages all of us to pay more attention. Just this. Just this, this room where we are. Pay attention to that. Pay attention to who's there. Pay attention to what is known there. Pay attention to what … [Read more...] about Pay attention
It’s about the support
What should I do? Have you ever been in a meeting where you aren't the one presenting, and you're not sure what to do?Some people disconnect, stop listening, or do their email, while others might look for ways to interject into the presentation. It's difficult to know how to play a role in … [Read more...] about It’s about the support
Making friends with yourself
What kind of friend are you? It’s taken me a long time in life to realize that there are different kinds of friends in this world. Some are the kind who are good listeners, others are the kind who you go to for a good laugh.There are the kind who are always up to do things, and then there are … [Read more...] about Making friends with yourself
Playfulness
Making space for play. If you're reading this blog, then you're someone who cares about personal growth.If you've been interested in sounding more authentic, trusting your own voice, or claiming your own authority, you've most likely noticed just how hard this work can be.The harder we try … [Read more...] about Playfulness
Stop bullying yourself
The bully. Do you ever notice the way we sometimes talk to ourselves?For instance, "I have to stop saying sorry."or"I should eat better."There's a lot of intensity behind these sentences.I've talked in the past about perfectionism and how it can make us brittle, and I recognize … [Read more...] about Stop bullying yourself
Your unique voice
What if you trusted your own voice? There are so many helpful tips out there regarding how to speak with clarity and poise, but what about how to speak as yourself?Do you want to have more confidence when you speak?Do you wish that you could have more influence when you speak?And do you … [Read more...] about Your unique voice
Feedback Loops
The nature of communication There's a phenomenon in communication that's quite common, but that doesn't get as much attention as it deserves.That's the phenomenon of a feedback loop in communication.I think of this as an important tool in our society as human beings. It allows us to orient, … [Read more...] about Feedback Loops
Charisma as a Leadership Tool
What is charisma? What makes a leader charismatic?And what do we even mean by charisma?If you've been following the war in Ukraine, you've noticed that Zelensky has proven to be a valuable and influential, charismatic leader, despite not having a background in leadership or … [Read more...] about Charisma as a Leadership Tool
What’s in your way?
The obstacle within. Is there something that you want to do, some change you want to make in your life, but you feel blocked?I don't mean changing who you are, rather changing how you are in the world.Maybe you want to start a business, take a poetry class, pick up cycling or do more … [Read more...] about What’s in your way?